What are Limiting Beliefs? (& how to overcome them)
The worst thing about not succeeding is when we finally realize that we are the reason we’re failing;
When we understand that we are holding ourselves back, that we are self sabotaging - maybe not realizing that we’re self sabotaging, but doing it because we have underlying beliefs - subconscious beliefs - that are holding us back
What are limiting beliefs?
Limiting beliefs are the stories we tell ourselves about who we are, what we’re capable of, and what’s possible for us, but in a way that’s negative.
They can also be beliefs that we have about other people and the world in general that affect how we behave and how we interpret what happens to us.
This subconscious way of labeling ourselves, of putting ourselves into boxes and filtering the world around us holds us back from reaching our true potential and stops us from becoming who we’re meant to be.
They are the thoughts we think so often, that we accept them as the truth.
Let’s consider his quote by Brian Tracy:
"There are no limits on what you can achieve with your life except the limits you accept in your mind" - Brian Tracy
Essentially - Limiting Beliefs are beliefs about yourself and the world, that you accept in your mind
Where do limiting beliefs come from?
Limiting beliefs come from a lifetime of experiences, of seeing and hearing things so often that they become ingrained in our subconscious in a way that feels true - even though they may not even really be true
We can describe this like a filter, a lens, that we develop and learn to view the world through.
Everything we’ve learned comes from the people and the world around us:
Our parents, our teachers, our colleagues, our friends and family, what we watch on TV, what we see in the news, what happened at certain times in our lives, our experiences, both and positive and negative - all of this shapes our beliefs!
Just like we learn to not touch a hot stove, we learn to not get burned when we have an experience that creates a sense of fear or discomfort or brings up a negative emotion
So they do serve a purpose - in essence, they help to keep us safe
How do limiting beliefs show up?
Some examples:
Remember that time you got laughed at in school, when you had to stand up at the front of your class and read? That might carry over into your adult life as a fear of public speaking
That time you failed an exam? Might make you think you’re not smart enough.
That time you got rejected? Might make you feel like it’s not worth trying again, that it will only lead to failure.
If you grew up in a poor family, you might believe that you’ll never be rich.
If everyone else is your life turned out to have a messed up life, you might believe you’re destined to live a messed up life too.
If you heard your parents say that rich people are bad, you’ll believe that too.
If your teacher told you that you’d never be successful, you’ll believe that too.
If the kids at school made fun of you, those things hurt, and they stick around.
There are thousands of possible examples of how this could be showing up for you.
When you're not achieving the results you want, or the success you feel you deserve in life, whether that’s related to personal, career or business goals, there’s very likely to be limiting beliefs holding you back - even if they seem unrelated to the goals you’re trying to accomplish.
Limiting beliefs CAN be changed
The most important thing to understand is that limiting beliefs are things that can be changed!
It’s really quite sobering when we realize that the limiting beliefs we have are really thoughts that we think on autopilot - they’re like bad thinking habits that have become so ingrained that they become what we belief by default.
We didn’t intentionally choose to believe them - we just accepted them.
What’s interesting here, is that our society doesn’t teach us to question. In fact, we’re taught the opposite: to obey authority, follow the rules, and accept what we hear and see as the truth.
When we finally realize that our limiting beliefs might not actually be true, that is when we’re able to access the power within, our real capacity to access our limitless potential - we are only limited by what we think and believe about ourselves
And I love this quote:
"You are not what you think you are, but what you think, you ARE" - Norman Vincent Peale
That one is a definitely a brain twister
What to do to overcome limiting beliefs: 3 simple steps
Step 1: AWARENESS
The first thing is to develop an awareness that limiting beliefs exist and to acknowledge that they exist.
Sometimes, that happens when other people make you aware.
Sometimes, something happens or changes in life that creates that awareness for you.
Other times, you feel lost, or stuck and can’t figure out what's going on, or can't find a way to move forward.
Sometimes you notice that you find yourself in the same types of situations over and over again.
These are the opportunities to take notice. Sometimes the clarity hits you right between the eyes.
Sometimes you have to dig a little deeper to get beneath the surface to find out what’s really going on.
Some questions to ask yourself are:
What is holding me back?
What am I thinking and feeling?
What is the underlying belief causing me to think or feel this way?
Where could this belief have come from?
Next, pay attention to how you're feeling - this is where noticing your emotions can be really helpful.
When you find yourself at a roadblock
If you’re facing failure or rejection
If you’re tempted to give up
If you’re afraid to put yourself out there or try something new and scary
If you’re hesitating to go for a big goal, or stand up for yourself
Whatever situation brings up your tendency to hesitate, to question, to back down, to hold yourself back, to self sabotage - notice the feeling you’re experiencing - It’s likely to be fear.
Underneath that fear is a limiting belief - where you feel not good enough, not smart enough, not strong enough, etc. - whatever it is, it’s an opportunity for you to become AWARE of the thoughts and feelings that could be holding you back.
It might be enough for you to take a walk and just think about this, or talk through it with a friend.
For those of you who like to journal, you could include these types of questions to help you work through your thoughts and emotions.
Whatever you choose, take the time to figure out what might be the root source of what’s holding you back
STEP 2: Create New Beliefs
Once you've identified what your limiting beliefs are, you get to decide to create new beliefs.
Yes - You get to decide what you want to believe instead.
It's this simple: You challenge your belief systems AND create new ones
Take each limiting belief that comes up for you and decide to believe something new, such as:
I'm not smart enough >>> I AM smart enough
I'm not good enough >>> I AM good enough
I'll never be successful >>> I AM successful
Whatever it is you believe, you have the ability to create new beliefs - and you get to do it on purpose.
STEP 3: Put it into Practice - Thought interrupt + New people & situations + Action
Thought interrupt: the practice of interrupting your old thought and replacing it with a new one
Once you have identified what those old beliefs are, any time you find yourself thinking them, you can deliberately stop yourself and think "I don't believe this anymore; this is what I'm choosing to believe instead"
It will take intentional focus and attention, but will get better with practice - so keep practicing!!
Be around new people + put yourself in new situations:
Deliberately choose to be around new people and put yourself in new situations that help you to believe what you want to believe.
If you have found yourself around people who tell you that you aren't going to be successful, find new people to spend time with who will support you.
Take Action:
If you're working on a goal, on creating something amazing, get out there and take action
As you take action and start to build some momentum, you will start to see some different results that will really help you will create new beliefs.
These new beliefs will help you to grow into a new version of yourself and serve you as you grow into your future self.
Don’t spend too much time thinking or dwelling on things.
Develop your awareness. Decide your new beliefs. Go out there and take action.
And practice!
Limiting beliefs evolve from a lifetime, and will take time to overcome - it’s an intentional process that will improve with time and practice.
And that is ultimately how you're going to change your limiting beliefs.
Are you ready to overcome your own limiting beliefs?
Check out my free guide “How to Overcome Limiting Beliefs”