Imposter Syndrome is a Dream Killer: Here’s How to Manage It

Have you ever asked yourself the question, who am I to do this?

Do you experience self-doubt, feel like a fraud, or compare yourself to others?

If you answered yes, you might be dealing with imposter syndrome.

What is imposter syndrome?

A simple way to define imposter syndrome is simply: a person who doubts their skills, talents and accomplishments, and has a persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a fraud.

The concept of imposter syndrome was first introduced in the late 1970s by psychologist Pauline Clance and her colleague Suzanne Imes, who studied high achieving women in education. 

Since then, it has been determined that imposter syndrome does not apply only to women, but equally to men as well.  In fact, it can impact up to 70% of the population across the board - even celebrities have admitted to feelings of imposter syndrome!

So it seems that imposter syndrome is much more widespread than we might imagine. 

Where does imposter syndrome show up?

Often, imposter syndrome will show up in career and in business situations - here are examples of both:

Career - when you’re stuck in a job you’ve outgrown or aren’t happy in anymore, your imposter syndrome shows up when:

• You feel like you can't ask for a promotion or a pay increase

• You feel like you can’t apply for another job because you believe you haven’t got the right skills, the right experience, or feel like everything you’ve accomplished or achieved is not good enough. 

• When you're looking at other job descriptions you might feel you don't meet the criteria, you don't stand up against other applicants, there's nothing special about you, and you doubt your ability to be competitive against other candidates.

The danger of thinking this way is that you can potentially stay stuck in that job and never really move forward. 

Entrepreneurship - when you’re looking to start or grow a business, your imposter syndrome can show up as:

• Fear of marketing and self-promotion

• Feeling really uncomfortable with networking

• Declining invitations to speak or to appear on podcasts or to write articles. 

• Failing to put your work out in the world, make offers to potential clients, or pitch your products or services against other competitors.

You’re underestimating yourself and probably know deep down inside that you really are more capable and have more potential than you're actually leaning into. 

Imposter Syndrome is a part of being human

When you're experiencing symptoms of imposter syndrome, you're having a human experience. It's natural to feel awkward and uncomfortable and feel fear, especially when you find yourself in situations where you’re being tested. 

When it comes to career advancement or starting a business, pushing yourself to become a different version of who you are brings up a lot of discomfort. Your brain’s job is to keep you safe, which leads into that human primal urge to fight, flight, or freeze. 

If you’re not taking action to move forward, feel like you might be holding yourself back, whether consciously or unconsciously, if you're doubting yourself, feeling like a fraud, comparing yourself to others, or thinking you don't quite hold up, imposter syndrome may be to blame. 

Can you relate?  

These are all things that I call DREAM KILLERS

How to manage Imposter Syndrome

If you want to deal with imposter syndrome, here are 5 things you can do to help you manage it:

1) Develop awareness 

The first step to overcoming any challenge is to recognize what’s happening - do you recognize any of these behaviours in yourself?

• Self-doubt - simply, the practice of doubting yourself, with a common reference to the question: “Who am I to do this?” 

• Minimizing accomplishments or achievements - believing things happened only because you had help, or because it was due to luck.

• Downplaying expertise -  believing you’re no better than anybody else, (by doing this, you’re discrediting your own skills, talent, hard work, accomplishments and expertise).

• Perfectionism - when you’re very sensitive to criticism and agonize over small mistakes, you feel like any work that you put out in the world has to be absolutely perfect before it can be shared. 

• A strong fear of failure - when you feel like you have to succeed at everything you do, and view failure as a bad thing, rather than an opportunity to learn and grow.

• Getting caught in the Comparison trap - you compare yourself to others in a way where you feel that you’re not as worthy or deserving of success as others, and that other people are better than you. 

2) Determine the root cause

Want to go a bit deeper into why you’re experiencing Imposter Syndrome, you can use an exercise called the 5 Whys

The 5 Whys will help to find the root cause of a problem.

• You start with the problem that you're having (see examples from point 1, above) and then ask yourself ‘why’?

• When you get the first answer, you ask ‘why’ again.

• You continue this by asking why 5 times, which will often help you get to the root of your problem and help you uncover any limiting beliefs you have.

3) Challenge your limiting beliefs

Once you’ve become aware of where imposter syndrome shows up for you, it’s an opportunity for you to challenge and reframe your thoughts and beliefs.

In a recent post, I addressed Limiting Beliefs and how to overcome them - check out the post here for a full walk through on the process.

I also have a free download to walk you through that process, which you can access here

4) Look for Evidence to Prove the Opposite

If you’re feeling like a fraud or an imposter, I guarantee that you're not one. 

Look for evidence to prove the opposite. Go back and look at all of your skills, your education, your expertise, your experience, the accomplishments that you've made throughout your career or business, the clients that you've worked with, etc.

Do you have client testimonials? Positive feedback from colleagues or bosses?

Collect all of that information and build a file of evidence that proves the opposite. 

When you're having a difficult time believing in yourself, go back and read positive things that other people have said, and acknowledge and celebrate your accomplishments - this practice can really lift you up.

5) Practice Acceptance + Take Action

When you practice acceptance, you acknowledge where your imposter syndrome shows up, accept that it’s there, and set an intention to not let it hold you back.

Then you get to work and take action:

• If you’re afraid to put yourself or your work out there, do it anyway.

• If you're feeling self-doubt, it’s time to go for it and do the thing that's making you feel doubt. 

• If you’re nervous about having your work criticized, share your work anyway.

• If you  feel like things need to be perfect, put something out there that isn't perfect. 

• Try things that might not work out. It will build your failure tolerance. 

The more that you do something, the more that you repeat it, the more comfortable you're going to get with being okay with failure and criticism. 

We're not going to be liked by everybody. 

We're not going to be perfect all of the time. 

It's part of life that we are also going to fail. 

And the more we do all of these things, the more comfortable we will get with it.

Don’t forget to take care of yourself

While you’re working through all of these challenges, practice self-compassion.

If this is you, and you’re becoming aware of how imposter syndrome is showing up for you, extend compassion to yourself for having this experience. 

We tend to be overly critical and harsh on ourselves in ways that we would not be with others. 

Consider this: if you were talking to a friend and they were going through these types of challenges, what would you say to them?  

Take what you would say to a friend and speak that way to yourself. 

Remember this:

Imposter syndrome may never fully go away - what you can do is learn to live with it in a way that does not stop you from success.

Eventually you can get to that point where maybe imposter syndrome never really goes away, and it probably will always be with you and keep showing up when you feel challenged, 

But with awareness and deliberate intention, you can get to that point where you can say: “Hey, imposter syndrome, I see you, I know you're there, but I'm going to keep going and I'm no longer going to hold myself back.”

So when you ask yourself questions related to your potential success now, instead of saying, who am I to do this?

You can say, well, who am I not to? 

Are you ready to get to work on managing imposter syndrome?

Check out my free guide “How to Manage Imposter Syndrome”